I appreciate The Holderness Family parents who recently posted a parody video about what it’s like to do NYC after you have kids. One thing I couldn’t personally buy into was how fit they were and that she was NOT carrying around an extra fifty pounds brought on by a 35-week-in-utero-baby-boy and excessive crumb cake intake.
She looked comfortable riding in her Uber and goofily dancing down the street.
Her husband could lift her up and twirl her into space if he wanted to.
That wasn’t exactly what our 24-hour trip to NYC looked like a few weekends ago.
It was amazing, but something about the big belly added an extra element that couldn’t be explained away. Even when we saw Lester Holt. I was tempted to ask him to sign my womb but couldn’t waddle fast enough to catch up with him.
No, when you’re 35 weeks pregnant in NYC, you see things a little differently.
Like this dog.
You ask if you can take a picture of the dog to send home to your six year old, because you know she will squeal seeing it like you are.
Like taking an Uber to Chelsea for dinner and acting like parents.
You spend the majority of the ride asking the young driver questions about what it’s like to be an Uber driver, how he gets paid, where he rents his car, how he likes it and … if he’s ever had anyone give birth in one.
You arrive to dinner at 4:30pm and are devastated that they don’t start dinner until 5:00pm. Which forces your aching feet to take, what is usually, a sweet walk on the high line. We took about 18 steps and found a bench. Thankfully, a teenage girl was taking ballet photos in casual clothing and point-shoes to keep us entertained.
You stop at Trader Joe’s on the walk back to the hotel and pick up lemon bundt cake to eat in the hotel — instead of going somewhere awesome. Which was my favorite part because it put us on our path to see the legendary Lester Holt.
Everywhere you look reminds you of your darling children.
The docent at the MOMA suggests that if you gave birth right then and there it would be considered a live art exhibit.
Every art exhibit reminds you of how you feel pregnant.
You order what you want for brunch and then worry about listeria the rest of the day. Smoked salmon! What was I thinking? (Update: No listeria was ingested.)
You order the ice cream you know your kids would desperately want, but the joy in eating it is that you don’t have to share.
You appreciate every single second of being alone with your husband. Because these days are so numbered. But, so important.
I, personally, keep telling myself and my kids that I’m tired. And naturally, for most of us with children and jobs and goals and dreams, at this stage in our life WE ARE TIRED, but it’s not an excuse to stop. Yes, rest and sleep, but I can’t hide behind it. And while our trip in NYC was slow, and full of Uber drivers who I thought might literally put me into labor because they were the scariest drivers I’d ever seen, it was worth it. We got away. Together. We can be too tired to not do it later.
This morning I read this New York Times post about Jimmy Fallon, and I was so moved by his closing quote. From Jimmy Fallon:
“If we’re going to do this, we’re going to do it right. There will be a day when we can allow ourselves to be tired. I don’t know when it is, but it can’t be now.”